Parenting time usually works best when both parents and children respect the schedule. But as kids grow older, especially into their teen years, things can get complicated. You may find your child suddenly resisting visits or refusing to go altogether. This can leave you feeling stuck, especially when the court order says otherwise.
Teens may pull away from a parent for many reasons. They might feel overwhelmed, caught in the middle or simply want more control over their own time. While their feelings are valid, it is still important to follow court-ordered parenting time. Balancing your teen’s emotions with legal expectations can be tough, but there are ways to make the process smoother.
Connect without forcing it
Instead of reacting with frustration or blame, try focusing on understanding and building trust.
- Talk to your teen during a calm moment: Ask why they do not want to go. Make space for their feelings, even if you do not agree with them.
- Avoid making them feel like they must choose sides: Teens often act out because they feel caught between their parents. Reassure them that it is okay to love both homes.
- Stick to the schedule, but with compassion: If your teen refuses, do not force them physically. Document the situation and let the other parent know what happened.
- Offer flexibility where you can: Letting your teen have a say in activities or timing can go a long way in making them feel heard.
- Consider a counselor or family therapist: Sometimes, a neutral space gives teens a chance to open up in ways they cannot at home.
These small steps may not solve everything overnight, but they can help rebuild trust and keep the focus on your teen’s well-being. Parenting a teenager is rarely easy, especially when court orders come into play.
If your teen keeps resisting, it may signal a deeper issue. Getting clear guidance from someone who understands family dynamics and legal structures can help you move forward with more confidence and less conflict.